Learning about Poetry (part 10): Vague to Detail

©2020 by Ken Wickham

All rights reserved.

In the last poetry post, sensory words and images were added to the researched set of rhymes in order to make the sentences more visceral. Here is the result so far.

I heard the bombastic busk,

blasting echoes in the city dusk.
"Don't be brusque!" I said to the one most abrupt.

A heavy scent of lingering fresh musk.

Beads of sweat on skin forming an aromatic musk.

Eating fishy cusk and crunchy rusk.

There by rainy, wet dusk.

The slippery sliding and gliding slimy mollusk.

Protruding sharp and long, like fangs

impaled deep and deadly the tusk.

I'm just an empty dried husk,

of my ancient former self.

Hurt and lusk, unmoving, sunken in a sofa.

From bright noon to darkening dusk.

A single undulating foot of a dark shelled mollusk.

Gone far by final dusk.

This exercise, I'll focus on making a few of the descriptions more specific.

I heard pounding in my eardrum the increasingly bombastic busk,

blasting echoes in the shadowy towers of the unfamiliar city dusk.

"Don't be brusque!"
I said to the one,
my foe,
whom I despise most abrupt.

A heavy scent drifted to my nostrils of wanted lingering fresh musk.

Beads of dripping sweat on skin forming an aromatic musk.

Eating healthy fishy cusk and satisfying crunchy rusk.

There outside my sanctuary, covered by showering-mist rainy, wet dusk.

The slippery sliding and gliding slimy mollusk,
oozed seeking paths, to my eyes, of glistening wonder.

Protruding sharp, menacing, and long, like fangs

impaled deep and deadly the tusk.

I'm just an empty, drained of all soul, a dried shriveled husk,

of a long past shell of my ancient former self.

Hurt and lusk,
unmoving, sunken deep,
almost under, in a reclining sofa.

From blinding light of midday noon to darkening mist of shadowed dusk.

A single solitary undulating foot, I beheld, of a dark shelled mollusk.

Gone far from my familiarity,
away from my home by final, unstoppable dusk.

Alright, I tried my best to expand and make it more detailed and a little less vague by making a few adjectives more specific. I also added some more action, commentary, and images. In the next poetry post, I'll try to check abstract vs concrete words.

Fables part 4: building a basic action & reaction

Myths Series
Myth making: my plan
What are myths, legends, and folklore? Definitions (Quotes)
Joseph Cambell : Myths

Myths: Types and functions

Mythology: How they are created

Myth #1: Blood and Water - Begin

Myth #2: From them, all become

Type of Myth #1 & #2; Fable #1: part 1

Fable part 2: bird symbolism

Myths and Fables: ponderings  & decisions
Fable part 4: snake symbolism
Fables part 4: building a basic action & reaction
 

Going through my notes, from both days and my ponderings, I'll now try to make a few sketches of some fables.

bird guide, atonement, resurrection, wisdom, hope, help, courage, happiness, splendor, or wisdom

snake healing, rebirth, benevolent, inspiration, creator, intelligent, without morals
fear, threats, untrustworthy, dangerous, and vengeful

• The dangers of expending too much power (magic) when using powers.
• How powers can be used for both good and bad purposes.
• Powers can be used in unusual ways besides obvious purposes.

Structure of fable

At the minimum, looking over the Aesop fables from both the bird and snake symbolism posts, a basic structure of the two interacting with each other either directly or indirectly.

bird + action.... reaction
snake + action.... reaction

Direct interaction
snake does something to bird.
bird does something to snake.

Indirect interaction
snake does something that leads to bird interaction.
bird does something that leads to snake interaction.

Bird and snake actions

Bird most often sings, eats, or flies.
Snake most often bites or slithers into hiding.

So based on these, I can have:
A.) Bird sings and the snake hears the song and then the snake reacts.
B.) Bird eats and snake sees bird eating and then the snake reacts.
C.) Bird tries to eat snake, and the snake reacts.
D.) Bird tries to fly, snake does something to prevent, impede, or change the flight of the snake for some reason.

H.) A snake tries to bite a bird, and the bird reacts.
I.) A snake slithers, and the bird reacts.

Not all birds sing.

J.) A bird crows, quacks, screeches, pecks wood, winnows, mimics, hoots,

Of course, not all birds can fly.
K.) A bird that can't fly is fleeing from a snake.
L.) A bird that can't fly seeks help from a snake.

And some birds can swim.
M.) A snake sees a bird swimming and has some plan.

And some snakes can swim as well.
N.) A water snake is swimming, and the bird reacts.

For snakes, I think that the healing, resurrection, and renewal symbolism of snakes from some cultures comes due to snakes the shedding of skin.
O.) A snake sheds its skin, and the bird reacts.

Pythons may also wrap and strangle their prey.
P.) A snake strangles something, and the bird reacts.
Q.) A snake tries to strangle the bird, and the bird reacts.

Birds may also be known for their talons.
R.) A bird attacks the snake with its talons, and the snake reacts.
S.) A bird grabs something with its talons, and the snake reacts.

Snakes hiss.
T.) The snake hissed at the bird, and the bird reacts.

Rattlesnakes rattle.
U.) The rattlesnake rattled, and the bird reacts.

Cobras rear upward, hoods flattened.
V.)  The cobra reared its head, and the bird reacts.

Next Post

In the next Post I'll explore possible magic context, since Aioskoru is a magical world.

A look at quickness of actions in RPGs

See also my more In depth Reviews

Starting a more in depth review series.

Test played Reviews: JAGS Revised

Test played Reviews: Hackmaster

Act first but not actually quicker actions
One of the biggest issues that I considered in all of the games is the normal disparity between having an attribute that is supposed to represent quickness such as Dexterity, Quickness, Speed, or Reaction Speed (REA) and having the ability to actually be quick by doing multiple actions in a single round. D20 products normally consistently perpetuate the lack of actually being in action rather than just being first in line. They prefer the 'I go first' method.

Feat or talent separation mentality
They normally just let Dexterity be added to an initiative roll. What that does is let characters act first, but not faster. A d20 character normally can only act more than once through either a feat/ability - which must be obtained separately - or through a system of standard action, instant action, and full action. While the third is the best to my liking, the actions are normally talent, feat, ability based in which dexterity has no influence on.

I looked into GURPS system and for it you also need to 'buy' more than one attacks.

Three Quickness methods
Only a few actually had anything to indicate speed of actions.

JAGS, Hackmaster, and several d100 systems have the systems that I liked the most. Each accomplish the speed adjustment in combat and round systems differently.

A) Hackmaster attaches the speed to the items, weapons, skills, actions, or spells. I think of it as the utility speed method.

B) d100 has a chart where intelligence and dexterity are combined to see how many actions a character has per round. I think of this as the body-mind method.

C) JAGS to me seems like the most ingenious of the methods. It uses the actual attribute as a pool of points which three levels of actions can use. A character can chose to do multiple actions directly based on the REA stat size - 3REA for short actions (reactions like defense), 5REA for medium actions (attack & spells), and 8REA for long (run away). In addition, skills and powers can increase or decrease the size of REA - like having a level 3 expert skill lets you take a 4 REA attack using that skill once per round. In the revised edition, you can even spend a few points to wait or delay actions. I just think of this as a direct attribute pool method.

Both d100 and JAGS require the character have available points in order to do defense. So that spending all your points on offense will leave your character unable to defend actively.

For me, it's important that quick characters actually act quick - and not just act first.

RPG and Story Scenes: The foundation of action within a story.

For the last series on  Character & Society see those posts.

RPG and Story Scene Series

RPG and Story Scenes: The foundation of action within a story.

RPG and Story Scenes: RPG scenes

RPG and Story Scenes: Writing and RPG methods
RPG vs Story Sequel: Reaction

I want to start the beginning of another possible topic for another possible series. I don't know how far I will go into this one at this time. I have at least ideas for five posts, but my last series about character and society went up to 12 or so posts. This is the topic of the 'scene'. Whether for stories or role playing games (RPGs), all of the real action happens in the scenes.

Scenes in Stories and RPGs

Foundation of a Scene

But like all of my posts, I must begin with a foundation laying stuff. Putting down some basics of what I know so that I can then build off of this common language and common body of ideas and concepts.

Gaming can learn a little bit of structure from story writing structures. Story writing teaches well how to structure scenes. It does however miss the mark on actually teaching about conflict.

Story writing can learn a little bit of conflict from gaming. Gaming has great mechanisms, structures, and resolution methods to measure and create conflict within a story or game.

All scenes and action are based on laws and logic of cause and effect.

But first, what is a scene?

What is a scene?

A scene is the place where a sequence of continuous action occurs to a cast of characters.

In both a story and a RPG the scenes are where actions take place. It will include movement, observations, decisions, effort, dialogue, skills, and risk.

How are scenes created?

Creating Scenes

Scenes are created in a number of ways. It may be planned ahead of time in some form. It may be in an outline, on a scene list, might be a rough description, summary of action, or it may naturally be the result of story flow while writing or an open sandbox game. As long as there is a goal of the scene related to the overall story, a description of major features of the location, and some sort of conflict - it's a scene.

Another type of scene sometimes is called a sequel or reaction scene.

What is the structure of scenes?

Scene Structure

In writing, normally the viewpoint character enters into a scene and begins to attempt to perform a goal, in the middle meeting with repeated failures or successes and end with resolution, a twists, or unexpected setbacks. The scene may or may not lead to a sequel. Scenes and sequels have beginnings, middles, and ends. What is in those structure differs between scenes and sequels.

Where are scenes?

Setting and Perspective of the Scene

The scene takes place in a single location and single point in time, with a single purpose. In writing, the scene focuses the point of view (POV) of one single character's experience. In RPGs, the story will focus on all of the present player characters.

How long are scenes?

Scene Length of Time

The length of the scene depends on the purpose of the scene. Less important scenes should be very brief. Important scenes may be longer. The importance and purpose of the content of the scene should determine the length of scene. Don't make unimportant scenes long. And don't make important scenes short.

With the basic definitions and concepts of a scene, lets look at the two types of scene in greater detail.

Two Types of Scenes

There are two types of scenes: action scene (proactive); and sequel or reaction (reactive) scene.

In the proactive action scene the viewpoint characters will have a goal, conflict, and resolution such as a setback. In a reactive reaction sequel the characters will react to something, show emotion, face a choice or choices - a dilemma - and reach a decision based on the character's personality, motivation, emotion, needs, lies, and ethics.

Begin by Establishing the Scene

Begin each scene or sequel by describing what is happening, what is around the characters in view, or what has changed if the location has been used before.

Describe the setting of the scene focusing on the three most important details that characters would notice.

Have the characters enter the scene - noting where they are in the scene in relationship to the space and other objects. Only describe things that they can see, limited to the view of the setting. They may describe the scene based on their own character voice.

Proactive Action Scene

Scene Goal and Purpose

The goal or purpose of the scene is based on the main character's decision based on personality type, motivation, emotion, needs, lies, and ethics. Without a goal, the scene will not have any meaning in the story or game. It cannot advance the story.

The goal itself should be something simple, real, valuable, possible, and challenging. Scenes with suspense might postpone the knowing goal until it is revealed as a surprise or shock. This is the only time when the goal shouldn't be obvious and presented up front.

Much of the scene should be full of subtext - unspoken character intentions, emotions, and reactions only implied. The most powerful strings being less likely to be recognized.

Scene Conflict

In a proactive action scene most of the scene should be conflict. Conflict is a struggle between two goals - what the characters want and what the opposition wants.

RPG gaming can teach story writers many things about conflict. Story writing sources for writing normally don't go into details about conflict as much as gaming. Story writing in my opinion excels at character development and story structure. Gaming excels at presenting conflict structures and mechanisms. In a future post I hope to present gaming techniques to examine different kinds of conflict.

Scenes should vary in intensity throughout the story and game. Intensity can depend on the stakes of the goal of the scene, the odds of the challenge, the movement within the scene, the arrival of new characters, and the environment of the scene. It may also depend on uncertainty, doubt, and something to worry about.

The scene should have at least two obstacles. The first should be apparent. The second might appear anytime and will increase the tension causing the characters to reconsider their actions. A third or more obstacles might be used in more important scenes such as the climax of the story arc. A scene with just one obstacle might be used as a transitional scene where the character just checks in on one thing.

Scene Ending

Except during the final confrontation - and even sometimes then - the scene should end or resolve with a disaster, twist, or surprise.

Reactive Reaction Sequel

Emotional Reaction

The first part of the reaction sequel is an emotional reaction to something that occurred, is learned, or comes to surface. The characters have instinctual physiological descriptions and knee jerk reactions. Emotions may be described. What does this mean to the characters. As awareness kicks in, the characters must analyse and think up options.

Analysis of Dilemma

The next part of the reaction sequel is for the characters to come up with possible actions and figure out what to do. They may use different methods of evaluation based on their character personality, motivation, emotion, needs, lies, and ethics.

There is the problem and then the possible solutions. Most of the solutions should be bad if the conflict is strong enough. The character(s) probably will choose the least bad solution.

Decision

This choice should be the next scene goal. The goal itself should be something simple, real, valuable, possible, and challenging. The reaction scene will then transition into a proactive action scene.